An impression so deep

My brother-in-law Tim has been talking about his plans for this trip for some time now. It was not until I saw an article today in the newspaper that it became real.

Although the article is written well enough and I certainly have no credentials as a writer’s critic, I still cannot help but think or feel that something is missing. The facts and information are presented and the timing of the article is perfect as October is breast cancer awareness month. The article highlights that the trip is designed to raise funds for the prevention of breast cancer. Tim will be riding his bike from California to Florida, a total of 3,200 miles in all. These are the fact as written by the newspaper and they are true.

What the article does not tell you is that this trip was originally planned over 20 years ago and that his wife Patty would be traveling with him on a tandem bike once their only daughter started collage. It does not talk about how their daughter started at Michigan State this fall and was born despite the odds, as it was during her pregnancy that Patty first discovered she had breast cancer. It does not talk about Patty and her will to live, her love of life or that crazy sparkle in her eyes. It makes no mention of how Tim took care of her from home, and even moved her bed by the second story window so that she could see the ferry dock and all the people coming to the Island that they both loved and she grew up on. You cannot hear how Tim talked to her in her final days, how he told her how beautiful she was, even those she was just a shell of the women he had married and you had to look really close to see that she still had that sparkle in her eyes. The article does not tell you who Tim is or Patty was or what they mean to those of us who know them. The article does not tell you, but I will.

I will tell you that Patty is the reason that I am still married today. I would have never made it through that first year without her telling me that it will get better and that my mother-in-law really did not hate me, though I was convinced she did. She was right about both. She hugged me so intensely when I first meet her that I could not help but wonder who she was, this personal holding me so tightly that all I could see was the top of her head. She did not know or care that I was not a hugger. We were family and that’s all that mattered. I did not know her long, but I didn’t need to for her to leave such an impression as to know why Tim will take this trip without her. He will be traveling on a bicycle built for one, but he will not be traveling alone.

In January of 2010 my brother -in-law Tim will be riding his bike from cost to cost to raise funds to prevent breast cancer. Is he a saint? Hardly, he is simply a fiery, passionate man on a mission. You see, it is just a matter of time before his only daughter is diagnosed with breast cancer and he knows it, she knows it and the clock is ticking. So Tim will ride for his daughter, he will ride for my daughter and he will ride for me and everyone else who’s cross this is to bear.

If you would like to support Tim on his mission, you can do so at http://www.bike4breastcancer.org/tim_leeper.html

“A thousand words will not leave so deep an impression as one deed”
- Henrik Ibsen

New Collage; Rain and Mary

Man did it feel good to get back into the art room and get messy!!!! I needed that.

I started this piece a long time ago and promised myself I would not start anything new until I finished it. Well its done and although my initial thought was to create as many variations of this image as possable, I don't see that happening right now. Its not that the ideas have stops, I'm just tired of looking at it and want to move onto something new. I have two done in the series and someday I may come back to it, but for now I need to move on. Actually I have already started something new, something more three dimensional that has really challenged and excited me. I cant wait to get back at it, but for now I need to celebrate finishing something!





RAIN: The image of the girl was taken by my in the studio, then collaged onto canvas using paint, paper and found objects.

When I was 5 I use to sing at the top of my lungs "rain drops keep falling on my hips" apparently I could not be convienced that the correct word was head. Creating this piece I found myself quietly humming and laughing at myself at the same time.


MARY: Both the lamb and girl are photos that I took. I love the sweet look of the lamb and wanted to create a piece using it. Naturally the lamb needed a Mary of her own.

What a way to start the day!

I was so thrilled this morning to find that one of my clients sent me a hand written note of thanks! I can not tell you how touched I am that she actually took the time to let me know how pleased she was. This is just a great way to start the day and I so very much appreciated the time and effort she took, my heart is warmed.





As if that were not enough, my daughter had me laughing so hard this morning my eyes watered and I could not swallow the vitamin I was trying to take at the time. She is such a funny girl and I would love to tell you all what she did, but it would embarrass her so I wont. I will just say TGIF and its good to be alive!

Old Habits Die Hard

I don’t know why sometimes it takes me so long to learn basic concepts.

I have made the mistake in my life of prejudging people. I’m not proud of it and I try really hard not to, yet it happens. I use to be notorious for meeting one part of a couple and automatically assuming that because I liked that person that I would not like the spouse. How that thought was automatically programmed into my head, I will never know. It took a few whacks upside my head and meeting a few incredible wives to realize that autopilot thought was keeping me from meeting some wonderful people.

That being said, I realized this weekend that I was prejudging again. I have come to realize that for the past year I had assumed that because I found one of my client’s children to be so much of a joy to be around, I automatically assumed the new sibling would not be the same or as much fun. Well she is not the same, they are as different as different can be, but certainly as much of a joy to be around in her sweet soft spoken way. Different is good, and they complemented each other beautifully.

I really enjoyed photographing these little ladies, but more than enjoying them on a beautiful day, I love that the family has chosen me once again to be their photographer. I love seeing the changes and being able to document them.

Courage

I spotted this cardboard sign yesterday while running errands. I have no idea what possessed me to turn the car around and take a picture, I’m not normally like that. Compelled as I was to take the picture the meaning of the word has been resonating with me all day. Courage. Such a strong word. Such a powerful word. What does it mean? What does it take to be courageous? Is being brave and having courage the same thing?

My thoughts keep wondering to a dear friend of mine who house I was on my way to when I saw this sign. I was heading to her home to photograph her new baby. Her new baby happened to be the adoptive kind and when I saw this sign I thought adoption, now that takes courage! I had not gotten a half mile down the road when I received the call saying that the birthmother had changed her mind and there was no longer a new baby for my friend to be photographed. Now the word really resonates in my soul… My friend knew as all adoptive parents know that the process is not perfect and people change their minds. She knew the risks of loving a child that is not yours by birth and she was willing to take it, now that takes courage! To openly put you in that position more than once, not only takes courage, it takes a strength that most do not possess. It takes a person like my friend, the most courageous person I know.

What I think takes courage …
Allowing yourself to hope.
To dream of something better
Being different
Loving someone and allow yourself to be loved
To stand up for yourself or someone else
Sometimes just getting out of bed to face the day
Squashing spiders for your kids

What dose courage mean to you?

My favorite quote from Georgia O’Keeffe
“I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life -- and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.”

Personal New Year

I realize for most people new year’s resolutions and reflections come with the ringing in of the new calendar year. For me personally it comes around the time of my birth, my own personal new year. I’m going to be 44 this year, nothing monumental no real milestone to celebrate but somehow this year feels differ rent. I feel different. I feel… somehow middle aged.

I’m what you would call a late bloomer, so I’m not particularly worried; I’m also not much of a life planner either. Oh sure I plan meals, vacation, parties and things to look forward too, but goal… not so much. I’m more of a fly by the seat of my pants, roll with it kind of girl. It’s not that I feel like I have not accomplished anything or that I have wasted my time, on the contrary I really feel fortunate that luck or god’s good grace has been on my side. But still … There is a lot I want to do, and I’m a list maker.

#1. Consider myself an artist!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m an artist. I’m a photographer. Better yet, I’m a “fine art” photographer. Don’t get me wrong I love photography and really I’m fortunate enough to make my living with my camera. But it’s really not the kind of art I want to make anymore. It’s the kind of art I get paid to make. Here’s the thing, the part of photography that I loved the best, the rush, the fulfillment came from working in the darkroom and watching my images, my vision develop in the tray. Heck I loved the entire process, exposing the film, mixing the chemicals, processing the film waiting…. Was I able to capture what was in my mind’s eye on film? I loved the feel and smell of holding the wet negatives up to the light to see if I had gotten the shot. I loved everything about the photography process the wrinkled fingers from being in chemicals far too long. The fixer film that built up on your teeth after working in the darkroom. All that I love about photography has changed and I miss, I mean really miss getting my hands dirty.

I’m an artist, without a medium. I need to find the fulfillment the joy, the love I once had for the photographic process.

PERMISSON TO PLAY; ok so 44’s not so bad and maybe neither are goals.
Deep breath… Goal; to have found and developed, my artistic medium by the time I’m 50.
Ready, set, go!

Welcome to my blog

Suddenly I am back in school with writing assignment that I just cannot figure out how to start. If only I had that one cleaver introductory paragraph the rest would flow…

I have written and rewritten that first paragraph a dozen or more times now, and yet I have posted nothing.

I have had several good intending friends try to encourage me to blog, each one with their own ideas of what I should choose as my topic, I’m a mom, I’m a business women, I’m a photographer, artist, wife, gardener, dog lover, tree hugger, interior decorator wanna be, all these things and more. All these things and more give me inspiration; define who I am and who I am becoming. I struggle with how I choose what the most important compartment of my life is. Someone suggested that I should only blog about my photography business, because, well, it would be good for business. That turned out to be too much like work and sucked all the fun out of what I think should be fun, or at the very least a creative outlet of some sort. Better yet, it should be about things that inspire. Maybe, just maybe what inspires me might inspire someone else.

I’m a lucky woman, sure I have bad days and my childhood was not picture perfect. But I can laugh at myself, photography has taught me to see the very best in people and I am able to wake up every day and make the choice to be happy.

Welcome to my blog!